office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize