She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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