i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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