Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
