Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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