oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
