I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
