I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize
