I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize
