belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My dick has a subreddit
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Randomize
