Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Me too!
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
