i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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