you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
