I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
