If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
