FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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