i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
