Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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