I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize