So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
