Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
