Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
