Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
