That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize