you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Randomize
