Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
