My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize