Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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