ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
