I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
