You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
