when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
