You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
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