Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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