Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
