he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
