i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize