we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
It's shark week go big or go home
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize