Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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