Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Oh god it's open bar.
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