i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
