quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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