Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
