The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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