and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
50% drunk capacity currently
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
