Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
