I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Omg I joined a choir last night...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
