The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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