He is an equal opportunity slut.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
