You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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