They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize