I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
