so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize